Tag Archives: life updates
Looooong time no see! The last month or so of my semester was pretty rough. It involved A LOT of studying, a good bit of stressing, and a trip to the emergency room with kidney stones.
Needless to say, I’m happy for a break.
I’m currently back home in Chicago (for two and a half weeks!!) and I am so thankful for a rest. Well, rest-ish. It seems like I have been running all over the place since getting back home. It’s been wonderful to see all the people who I have missed so much, but I am le tired.
Anyway, today (Merry Christmas, btw) it really started to sink in how badly I need rest. Consistent rest. Rest in my day-to-day life. And not just fall int0 bed at midnight rest, real rest. Rest for my body and my soul.
I have been doing the #shereadstruth advent study, and it has been some much needed refreshment for my heart. As the new semester approaches, I want to start it right – keeping myself on pace in school so it’s not a mad rush at the end of the semester and taking time each day to really take care of my heart.
This always turns out to be a more daunting task than I anticipate, but without making an effort, I am just setting myself up for a world of stress and anxiety later.
So for the rest of the break, I am hoping to rest, really rest, so that as the new semester begins I will be prepared emotionally.
I also want to get back into blogging. It’s been so long I barely know where to start, but I’ll take it one post at a time and see how it goes.
I hope you had a Merry Christmas, Internet and a restful holiday season
Hey Internet. I know it’s been a while since I told you about Binx or gave you any real update on what is going on in my life. My mom was here for two and a half weeks and then I had some oral surgery because my teeth are the literal worst, but now I’m back to kind of real life.
So I’m sitting here with Binx perched over my shoulder – the appointment with the feline oncologist basically wet as planned “We think its most likely lymphoma, but to know for sure you need to give us thousands of dollars you don’t have to do exploratory surgery OR we can put him on prednisone to make him feel better until he doesn’t.” I have never felt so guilty for being a poor grad student. Binx is on prednisone, and its been making him feel better. He finally started eating wet food which was SUCH a relief. Unfortunately, his eating has been declining the last few days and I’m worried. Adorabeezle Winterpop says she thinks he is still ok, but I don’t fully believe her. The hardest part is remembering everyday that he is dying – when he is acting more normal its hard to remember he isn’t actually healing. We are biding time, and that’s really hard some days.
The Whole 3o
The last two months have been total and complete bitches (pardon my french, but it is accurate), and my eating (and life in general) habits have not been great. After a wonderful friend lost a close family member recently (I told you these months have been horrible) she told me she needed to find ways to grieve healthfully. I totally related to that notion and knew I needed to work on how I had been eating and living. While loosing my cat is nothing compared to the grief some of my loved ones are experiencing, A LOT has been taking an emotional toll on my and it’s been rough.
I decided to try the Whole 3o because I heard amazing things about it and I knew I needed make a real change and now we are here. I haven’t had any sugar since June and its been… interesting. Mostly good, but I’ve been really tired. One my system gets used to not having any sugar hopefully I will have some good energy. For now, if you are interested, you can follow along on my Whole 30 journey on instagram. I’m posting way too many food pictures, hoping it will keep me accountable.
Because of everything that has been happening, I have really been craving time in the Bible and with books that point me to Jesus in general. I’m reading Carry on Warrior: The Power of Embracing Your Messy, Beautiful Life by Glennon Doyle Melton (her blog, Momastery, is amazing). I’m also waiting with baited breath for my signed copy of Anchored: Finding Hope in the Unexpected by one of my top five ever bloggers Kayla Aimee. I’m very excited for both and know how much my heart needs words right now.
Anyway Internet, that’s what Life has been like recently. How have you been? I’ve missed this place.
Well hello there Internet!
I know. Its been FOREVER since I posted anything on this here little space. I don’t have much of an excuse seeing that my posts were getting sporadic even before I disappeared. But let me tell you, things got pretty crazy there for a while.
Basically, on April 2nd I heard back from my first grad school and was told “Congratulations! You need to decide where you are going by April 15th.” Obvi, I skipped right over the happy “You got into grad school!” part of the letter, and focused in on that one date. April 15th. As in less than two weeks after hearing back from the first school. As in I had some decisions to make NOW, and very little information to make them with (info like: Did I get into any other schools? Can I get any financial aid? When will I hear back from those jobs I applied to?) Basically, I pulled a Tina Fey and took something that should have been good news and made it into something panic-inducing and stressful.
So I spent 2+ weeks on a total roller coaster of emotions. For a while I legitimately thought I would be moving back to Illinois. I called my mom crying A. LOT. (Sometimes more than once a day – Praise the Lord for a mother who will answer the phone after midnight just to hear me whine about all my stupid options). And finally when April 15th rolled around I got a very clear answer as to where I should be next year, and it is here in Florida. Literally on April 15th. After telling two schools I would be attending. It was a strange two weeks… But it was worth it. Next year I am going to be a TA in a stats class, and am excited for the adventure ahead of me. (I’m also very excited to stay with Adorabeezle Winterpop and Mickey Mouse).
Other than hard core obsessing over my future (seriously, I was obsessed. I apologize if you were on the list of people I texted incessantly about it), a lot of time was spent letting myself kind of shut down emotionally – It was a lot for my robot nerves to handle and I can’t say I handled it the best ever. I can’t say I handled it the worst ever either. I’d say I handled it… mediocre-ish? So now I have a plan, and I’m trying to put myself back into intentional-mode. I need to re-break my 2048 game addiction and start to be a productive member of society again. I have finals to study for and apartments to search for – we are escaping the Titanic!!!! And people to see and blogs to write.
With summer break approaching, I really am going to try to make this blog more of a priority, I promise.
So what did I miss with you Internet? Do you have any exciting news for me?
I have a lock of my friend’s hair in a little box on my bookshelf. I know that’s kind of a strange way to start a blog post, but it feels important.
I have a lock of my friend’s hair in a little box on my bookshelf, and to me that is friendship. Other people have used different words for it: weird, gross, “Ew! Why is there hair in here?!,” but to me it is just pure unadulterated friendship. It’s my friend Jackie’s hair – she gave it to me after she got a haircut that was particularly hard for me to handle emotionally.
I am very emotionally attached to hair. Not just my hair either – my friends’ hair too. It may not be quite healthy… I also tend to make friends who have beautiful, thick, long hair who then tend to cut it, and it hurts my soul.
A love of long hair was instilled in my from a young age (thanks mom) and I’ve never out grown it. My mom cried the first time I got more than a trim (I cut my hair from butt-length to mid-back length in middle school). And now, as proof that I am becoming my mother, I find myself desperately trying to talk my friends out of hair cuts. When idkmybffPaula joined the Navy I really almost cried when she had to cut all her hair off – she has think blond hair that I literally want to steal from her head so I can put it onto my own – and it was so long when she had to get a Navy cut for basic training.
Lest you think I’m just a crazy person with my friends’ hair, let me tell you I am just as nutso with my own. I am so afraid of change and that does not stop when it comes to hair. I basically always go in saying “I want some layers, but keep as much length as you can” and my hair basically stays the same forever.
Sometimes I dye it and I have had a successful perm or two (its a real thing – you can have a nice perm – the key is a hairdresser who has been cutting your hair since you were 3 and a wavy look). But mostly I don’t change anything to do with length.
But every so often, a question looms…. should I try bangs again? If you are friends with me on facebook, then you have had the distinct pleasure of witnessing my bi-monthly bangs crisis, when I beg the internet to help me make a decision about getting bangs and then I do exactly nothing to change my hair.
After reading the first part of this post, it should not surprise you that this question is usually posed when I am feeling particularly sad and/or lonely. The haircut-emotions link is strong up in here.
So last week, after I had gone from seeing so many of my favorite people to being alone a lot of the time, the question came up again – should I get bangs?*** The internet is split on the subject.
But I decided that I had gone back and forth too much. I am being intentional this year, and sometimes intentionality means taking a risk you have been thinking about forever (yes. I know I am just talking about hair here – just go with it), and so I decided to take the plunge…
AND I LOVE IT SO FRACKIN’ MUCH!!!!
I screwed up my courage, went to the Aveda institute, and got an $18 haircut that I love. (Yes. It was $18. If there is an Aveda Institute by you, you should check it out. They are students, but their teachers have to sign off on everything and even take over if they are having a hard time. It was an educator who did my bangs and another made sure my layers were even. So if you want to live on the edge and get a cheap haircut, that is the way to go!)
Anyway, thanks to all my facebook friends for putting up with my agonizing. I realize I am crazy, and am thankful for people who encourage me even when I am a nutcase.
Have a happy weekend Internet, we are almost there!
***disclaimer: normally I do not recommend getting an emotional haircut. It is usually not a good idea. It was just time for it in this case.
Hey Internet! Well it turns out this whole “intentional” thing is hard (who knew?!?)
School has started and I still have a ton of stuff that needs to happen in my room before it is “study ready,” meaning I can sit my computer on my desk and do work (I know – I’m dreaming big here).
Basically there is this whole list of things I want to intentionally get done… But I’m tired and distracted by things I have no control over and I’m trying not to be sad about being back home and… I believe this is what the people call “overwhelmed.”
I’m trying to take it one step at a time: step one: go to class, step two: go to work, step three: pick ONE thing and do it. Step four: repeat.
Basically this grownup thing is hard and I want to take a nap (but I can’t take a nap because my sleep schedule is crazy messed up and naps aren’t helping).
But I’ve whined at you enough. Shall we list things we are thankful for? I think we shall. I am a big believer in lists and they always make me feel better. Here we go:
1) The starbucks I will buy today so I can avoid napping.
2) Bookstores – even when I’m only going in for textbooks.
3) My people. Basically every day I realize that I have the best people in the world. Seriously. The best.
4) A roommate who helped me but together the best finals/get pumped mix of all time.
5) Amy Poehler on audiobook.
6) JAY Z. I feel like i don’t need to explain this. You are either going to understand this on a deep, spiritual level or you won’t and my explaining it won’t help.
7) A blogging small group with some awesome ladies.
8) The WordPress app.
9) Netflix and crocheting.
10) my family, and not the least of which my dad, who is way cooler that your dad I guarantee it. (Hi dad).
Now it’s your turn Internet. What would you put in spot 11?