Hey Internet! Happy Tuesday. We have officially entered test-season over here. I had one last Thursday, I just finished one and I have one this Thursday. Plus I take the GRE next Wednesday, so nbd, I’m just freaking out all of the time. I’m taking a quick break between test-taking and test-studying to tell you about a day last week where coffee literally almost killed me.
It was the day of the first test of the semester and I had gotten around 2 hours of sleep (I wasn’t up studying- I just seriously couldn’t fall asleep. It was a problem) I knew I needed energy in order to power through my classes (as well as go to Hollywood Studios with Adorabeezle Winterpop afterwards because, you know, good life choices and all that).
I figured that Test Day deserved some Starbucks . And that that Starbucks needed to be a venti and while we are at it, let’s add an extra shot of espresso because I got no sleep and, you know, good life choices. So I ordered my new favorite drink – a cinnamon dolce flat white with said extra shot and when I got it I looked at the label and it hit me that I had just purchased a beverage with a QUADRUPLE shot of espresso. You know, like someone who makes good life choices.
So I drank my coffee (in record time) and I went to school and I totally killed my test and then I sat through my second class. By the end I was exhausted again so I walked over to the coffee shop in the school library and got a medium Mayan mocha because, you know, good life choices (this also happened to be espresso shots 5 and 6 for those of you keeping track at home).
So I drank my (really amazing) latte and sat through my two hour linear algebra class and went home. Then I Adorabeezle and I promptly left to go to the Studios (We had a dismantled hat to see). So we get to Hollywood and – what’s this? – the park’s Starbucks opened yesterday?! DON’T MIND IF I DO!!
And this is where the life choices go bad. Very very bad. Turns out chugging half of a grande iced caramel macchiato (shots 7 and 8) after 6 other shots of espresso and I don’t even want to think about how much milk will make you want to die.
Honestly, I don’t think it was the coffee as much as the milk. My stomach basically gave up on life and made it very clear that if I did not find something healthy to put into it right away it was going to revolt. So I got the healthiest theme park food I could find (a quinoa and arugula salad topped with Salmon – it was pretty dang delicious). And waited for my body to start functioning properly. Which it eventually did.
Basically the entire day was a lesson in why maybe I should pay more attention to what I am doing to my body. Also that caffeine does not have lasting effects on me and maybe I should just try napping next time. Maybe.
Has coffee ever tried to kill you Internet? Or am I the only dumb one around these parts?